somebody has a stander

and she likes it. Looks kinda big, huh?

Wouldn't you just LOVE to be me, right now?

First, eye surgery...then heart monitoring...then rotator cuff injury...then near broken ankle. Add all this with dental appointments, Rachel's therapies, orthodontist appointments, neurology appointments, more eye surgeon consults, and court to testify against a child pornography viewer that my husband turned in.......I have about had enough! Seriously! I am spent. This is beyond the limits of my control. Failed to mention, Ohio in May and California in June...where is the money going to come from for that? We are uninsured (Tony and I) and his x-rays and dr. visit cost 110.00 (to be clear...that was half price due to self pay) Medicine was 12.00. Thank the Lord for the 4.00 wal mart plan. Orthopedics and surgery will probably be a ton! Know where any good rocks are?? I would like to crawl under one right now.

miscellany

Well, this weekend has been fun! We decided to move the sleeping situations around. We are now in the dining room, which is just off the kitchen....the boys (Aaron, Braydon, Conner, and Nathan) are in our room...and we now have a much larger exercise room. We have 2 treadmills, an eliptical, an exercise bike, and a total gym...plus a small trampoline, and some free weights. Why are we fat? Because we lack movation, and there was no room in the house to put it all out. So, now.....we can have all of it set out ready to hop on, and we will have a t.v. in there so maybe I will watch exercise videos or something....or just keep the kids happy with a video where I can watch them. :) I am sure Amy knows what I mean there!! Hopefully, this works out.

On another note....we have sold some things on craigslist... I am so happy about that! We found a perfectly nice hideabed that someone was throwing away. Nothing wrong with it. Loaded it up, along with a platform bed, and took it home. We gave the bed away on freecycle, to a very happy woman I might add...and then sold the couch. Made $75.00! We also sold a toddler bed that we no longer need. Since Rachel is disabled, we will not likely be putting her in a toddler bed anytime soon, and Nathan already has one, so we had an extra. Sold it for $40.00 to a very excited mommy! Also, we found a printer on ebay just like the one we had that I loved, but finally wore out. Bought it the same day we sold the couch....guess how much we got it for???? $75.00. God is so good, isn't He? This printer is a newer model than my old one, plus comes with lots of extra ink. WooHoo!!

Aaron's eye is still messed up, so we emailed the surgeon, and are going in on Monday to reevaluate the situation. I want another surgery, and don't think it is benificial to wait 6 weeks. He is still seeing double when he looks up or to the side, for crying out loud! That can't be fun?!

We are now going to another church. It is a church comprised of mostly homeschoolers. Larger families, and all that too! My kids love it there and feel very welcome and at home. I miss our old church, but feel like God wants us to go where it is safe for my kids. There is no boyfriend/girlfriend talk, no texting cell phones, no secular music discussions....Just plain family stuff. Kids are kids there....not wanna be adults with attitudes. We told our old pastor about this church in a discussion that I will most likely talk about on another post. He was kind of non commital...he misses us, but wants us to go where we feel like God wants us to be.

No weight loss this week, but moving half a house might help by next week, ya think?

Joann, where are you?????????

Hi, Amy! This one is for you

Joann, you should go to Amy's website (www.humblemusings.com) and join in the weightloss challenge. You are already doing it on your own, you should become part of the group...it would be great accountability (plus you might win 200.00!)

Amy, just a couple of random shots....my husband and I , and then my face...ick, I hate the double chin. I never had one of those before. Must be the 30's. Click on the one with my husband and me. It looks better up close. Aren't we a nice couple??? :)

aaron's "progress"

This is what we are still dealing with. I am still angry.... The surgery was a success in releasing the trapped muscle and placing an implant in his orbit to prevent intrapment again, but he is still having trouble looking up, and is still seeing double. We are possibly looking at muscle surgery in another 5 to 6 weeks.

Why am I angry? Well, originally when this happened, his vision was double and his eye was all wonky. They did a CT scan, and told us he fractured it and the muscle was trapped. Sent us to an MD eye doctor. He then transferred us to the ear, nose and throat doctor....not quite sure about that one, but whatever. He kept seeing "improvements" in Aaron's eye movements, so we kept being told to wait. The kicker was the Thursday of last week. He was about to discharge us and call it a day, saying he had much improvement and all looked great. I looked at him incredulous, and said, "are you seeing what I am seeing??" I had Aaron look straight at me, and told him to lift his eyes. This is what we saw. It was crazy, but I think because the doc was having him lift his head, it looked like improvement, but when his head was straight, it was so obvious. He immediately was on the phone with the plastic surgeon.






This is now, 3 days after surgery. Not a whole boatload of difference, huh?

Did we waste precious time waiting around for this doctor? Did the time cause his problem to be worse, or was it there from the get go? There was no scar tissue according to the surgeon, so his take is that the muscle was damaged, thus the surgery in the future. Is it really appropriate to wait that long for that proceedure? Is my son going to see double vision for the rest of his life due to some doctors error?

Aaron surgery photos

This is where they marked which eye to operate on, so they dont go fiddling with the wrong one.

This is me, in my surgical mommy garb...I got to go back with him, and watch him start to seize from the anesthesia...that was weird!! they said it was normal, but I didn't like it ONE bit.

Right after surgery, still zonked out.

Fully awake and ready to go home, complete with the hospital puppy.....

Aaron update

surgery scheduled for first thing monday morning...more about that later, when I am not angry. Maybe i will still be angry then, too, but more later anyway...

Aaron's eye....

This is now....`

This is about 2 days in...

Mother N

N is for Now What?!!?

Aaron fell yesterday and broke bones around his eye socket and nose. He planted his face smack dab in the end of a scooter handle. He cannot move his eye up and down, and they are talking surgery.

Ashley is going for an echocardiogram today due to heart pain and palpitations. Her biological father died in his 30's due to a heart attack.

We got back from Amarillo Sunday night after hanging out all day long in our hometown waiting for day to pass so we can go to a really cool light display and double decker bus ride/train rides, only to find out they only do it on friday and saturday nights....it was sunday. Only the sign said all activities open all weekend. I guess sunday isn't a weekend?? So we wasted money, gas and all day for nothing.

My husband is seriously backlogged at work and it just got worse with the hospital visit yesterday and then he had to take Ashley today because I have to take Aaron to the eye surgeon.

Oh, but my son's team won the lego robotics tournament. Their team won out of 41 teams. We get to go to Ohio in 5 months now to the u.s. open tournament. It is in Dayton. I have never been to Ohio. Between this little jaunt, and the micro conference in July, we are gonna be broke.

Letter M

My my my, I am busy!!! We are currently packing to go to Amarillo for the lego tournament. I don't know what compelled us ALL to go, but the kids see any opportunity to go anywhere as the funnest thing ever. So, we booked 2 double king rooms for 2 days and we shall see how fun it really is.

Mommyhood should be this letter. It can be the busiest profession out there. Seriously! Between having to shuttle the 17 year old to out of town basketball games, running the concession stand for the in town games, taking the baby to therapies and appointments, going out of state for one child, taking another to a doctor about her heart, AGAIN!, and then 4-H christmas parties, this mom is pooped! And we aren't even as involved in extra curricular stuff as others I know.

Last night, I had to force myself to wash a load of laundry and do the dishes. The kids did the dishes last time, so I thought I would give them a break. However, I am so pooped that when it was time for bed, I was out like a light, until this morning. Earplugs are the BOMB!! If you have any trouble sleeping AT ALL, you need them. My husband has been SO GOOD at getting up with Rachel, so if you have a supportive husband, go for it. Of course, if he wasn't on board, I could always have just had a baby monitor next to me, and woken up to that. They don't cancel all sounds completely, and I would have heard crying on a monitor. In any event, I should feel rested after last night, but I really am not.

This mothering gig is hard some days. I feel like I don't know what I am doing, and I fumble along. I hate cooking, and cleaning, but I love hanging out with them. So, at least I have half right, huh?

Oh, and we checked out the local YMCA yesterday....we may be getting a family membership there. Maybe that would motivate me to get off my big ole butt and do some exercise . I am such a frugal cheapo that if I spend any money, it better not be wasted or else!! LOL!

howdy folks!

sorry friends...I have been super busy. 3 basketball games over 3 days (2 out of town), lego practice (we are going to amarillo in 1 week!!!!!!! for the next level of competition), getting house ready for the stupid med rep guy who was bringing Rachels equipment, only to discover all he needed to do was bring it in the house and leave. And he made everything reek of cigarette smoke!!!! that made me boil. I shouldnt have to wash down $10,000.00 worth of equipment before it is used, should I? Oh, and then yesterday was my birthday! The whole world celebrated with me, except I didn't get any presents from them...sheesh. I did get a bird stuffed animal, a bird drawing from adam, and a bird drawing from braydon. I am not sure why they seem to think I needed birds, but I will take them and love them just the same.... :) And now, i just found out that the enormous stack of boxes we painstakingly got the other day for clutter removal has been rained on overnight...it was NOT supposed to rain. Our old stroller was outside too. A computer monitor from a customer that tony took out of the car--wet! ugh!

A break from the alphabet....

Nathan just turned 3! I didn't intend to miss putting it on my blog. We celebrated with a tiny cake and an Oswald book!!! Happy birthday kiddo.

Little Miss Rachel getting a bath--given by her biggest brother. We are training him to even do the little things, so he is prepared to be a daddy should that day come. (((Shudder!!))) :0)

Oh, and isn't this little boy so strange? He sucks on the side of his lips, and I have NO idea why!! The squint was simply what he does when you tell him to smile!! Har dee har! Oh, and don't leave without noticing the blankie!! I have never had a blankie baby....or one that sucked his lip...or one that was left handed...or one that refused to potty train....or one that is so super independant that he makes me want to pull my hairs out. I have however had 7 other children besides him that make my heart melt. And make me wanna snuggle closely....and just hold them close until they wiggle to get out....

Mother L

Love, loss, laughter, busted lips....I have experienced them all.

*Love-I am so full of love for my family that I would do anything for anyone of them. I sometimes wonder if I love them too much. I am too lenient sometimes, for fear of making them upset, and I probably let them get away with more than they should.

*Loss-I have lost both my real parents, and my step dad. I have had a miscarriage. I have lost whatever semblance of a close relationship with my 2 much older siblings there may have ever been. I have lost trust in most of humantity. I have lost my way spiritually, in that I have no clue where I want to go to church. I know I want to go, but where to go?

*Laughter-we laugh here OFTEN!!! I am always making up these silly lyrics to go with mainstream songs, and the kids just get the biggest kick out of it. We tell jokes, and we love to play the tickle game. Someone is always laughing here...it is a great sound.

*Busted Lips-Well, my goodness! It wouldn't be a home full of boys without it, would it? My 17 year old comes home tonight after basketball practice with one....my baby just got one....my 7 year old is still healing from one. It looks like we prize fight here! Oh, the blood....ick!

Mother K

Keep it simple, stupid! In my entire existance, I have preferred the simple things. Don't buy me rings or jewelry, make me a card. Don't bring home flowers, wash the dishes. Be simple. We don't have lots of high tech things in our homes, our house is decorated simply, and we value the simple things in life.

I am also the queen of improvisation. That is a simple thing....If your tub drain is plugged with something, and you can't fix it for some reason, push the stopper, take shower, and use a shop vac to suck out the water and dump it down the toilet (or if your really adventurous, use it to water your plants or something). Don't get all worked up over things. Life is too SHORT !!!! Spending every waking moment stressing about something is useless. It doesn't make it any better and you just get ulcers and stressed kids or spouses. Seriously....keep it simple!

Mother J

I pondered just what to write for this letter, and couldn't come up with anything....Seriously. I thought, Joy, Just do it (clean house), Jesus, and a couple others...but nothing got my juices flowing. Until now...............

I have had an epiphany! All my readers names begin with J, except Robyn, but her husbands name is JAY!!!! How freakin cool is that??? Joann, Julie, Jane, and Mrs. Jay. SWEET! I totally deserve the creative award for that one, don't I? I am sooo smart.

Anyway, about my readers. You 4 are the elite! Seriously, I do NOT give our my blog for anything. God must have put it on my heart to give it to you 4 for some special reason, because I just do not give it out....

Robyn was my first reader, and she is awesome. Except, I usually forget to email her, and I FINALLY did, and now she owes me!!! But she probably doesn't even notice. :( Seriously, she is an awesome mommy to 3 girls, a homesteader wanna be (soon!!), and a girl after my own heart. We have alot in common, even though at first glance you wouldn't believe it. She is little miss neat, and can get rid of stuff in an instant. No holding onto it for her!!! She constantly makes me laugh with her quips and humor. She is currently wanting to adopt a sibling group of boys, and God willing, she will get her wish.

Joann was reader number 2. We have alot in common too, and the more we talk, the more we find out. She used to live here in Oklahoma even. She has the most beautiful 2 grandbabies (that she adopted as her own), and one of them is disabled like Rachel. They are very similar in disabilities, and about the same age. We compare stuff all the time, and are very encouraging to each other too. She is such a cool person, and I am glad I met her!! She lives in California, and will be the first one I try to meet in person when God willing, we get to go to the microcephaly conference next year.

Jane was reader number 3. I met her via the disabled groups, which I think Joann is on also. She lives in New Zealand, and that in itself is soo cool.....Who do YOU know that lives in NEW ZEALAND? I want to visit her!!! She doesn't come here often, but I know she does some. She has the cutest little boy that is currently overcoming disabilities himself. He is walking, and talking and all sorts of things. He has made it very far, and I am sure it is due to his mommy and daddy's help. She is pregnant with baby #2~ a girl!!!!!!!!! I am so excited for her, and she is only going to make the family much better...more kids, more love, ya know?

And lastly, I recently "met" Julie. She also lives in California, and is a homeschool mom of 5. She just started the homeschool journey, and seems to be doing very well! Her kids are just the cutest, and I love reading about their adventures. She knows life with a special needs child, and can relate to me in that respect. She also wants to adopt, and is currently "pregnant", waiting on a child or children from Ethiopia. I like to think that we have the same writing style, except she might not think that. She writes much longer posts and more often than me. Grin!

Isn't it strange how everyone has something in common? Two california girls, 3 disabled/special needs parents, 2 adopting, 1 who has adopted, 3 who homeschool, 1 who wants to, 2 on a journey to get rid of everything, and the list could go on......

I love each one of my readers, and can only hope that I will continue to get to know each one of you more and more though my blog and yours. We are all doing this blog thing for encouragement, and memory preserving, and to meet friends. I think we are going about it just fine. Thank you all for coming here and encouraging me.... (((hugs)))))

wow! and the other guy won?

Mother I

Idiots...they are my pet peeve. I have written here before about my stuggles with people who don't want to pay my husband for work he had performed. I can't think of anything I like less than to fight for what is mine. They will tell me, "Oh the check is on the way, sorry about the confusion" and it not be. I will have to write or call AGAIN to get told the same bull AGAIN, and people wonder why I trust no one. I HATE being lied to! Seriously.

Just recently, I went through another idiot session with a book club I am the homeschool liason for. I had a bunch of money to give them, and they didn't want to take it. For 9 days, I went through baloney. I finally had to become a very assertive individual...and demand that they fix the problem as well as ship my stuff express mail, on their dime. They did it... I shouldn't have to do this, but it works.

I don't take crap from anyone, and while it is a good quality to have, it leaves me unable to trust most people. I am forever saying "Yeah, sure" when talking about someone's word. Not necessarily to their faces, but to myself or my husband. I am a great judge of character, and usually am right. It is a sad state of affairs though, when you can't trust people...

Mother H

H is for home. I love to be home. I am such a homebody, and it is very different than when I was a kid. I lived out in the country and home was a prison. We nver went anywhere, and never saw anyone, outside of school. Summers were hard, let me tell you. So, when i moved out, I was always on the go. Here there and everywhere.... I was never home! Now that I have grown up, I prefer being home. I don't like to leave. Maybe it has something to do with the sheer number of things I have to do before I can leave or the sheer number of people who want to leave with me, but maybe it is easier to stay home. LOL! We do go to thrift stores about one time a week, and to the grocery store the same. I take one child to vocal music lessons one time a week, and actually that is about it. I could stay home the rest of the time. It got pretty crazy here for awhile, living in our van almost, but the minute I can squash that, I do! If Tony can run the errand, or take the kid somewhere, I most always have him do it. He is also the one to get the daily pops...I just don't like to leave...period.

Home is also the place I want my kids to always come back to. True, it is messy and full of people, but that makes it more cozy....Who am I kidding? The mess has got to go. I am always working on that one. But the people...there is always someone to play with, talk to, tickle, hug, or argue with here.

I don't particularly care for THIS home, except if I could fix everything that was wrong with it, I might be more inclined to want to stay. Plumbing is a huge problem, and I don't want to get milked by a plumber, so I just leave it unfixed....The neighborhood is mostly college kids, which hasn't been a big problem lately, so maybe it will stay that way. Otherwise, we have no problems calling the police.

Home is where the heart (and the mess) is.......

Mother G

Well, what better letter post about G than about God? I have to rely on Him so very much, for so many things. Especially now, with this election shock. God is firmly in control, and He has allowed what the people want, but surely He cannot be happy with the way his world is going. I have known for a very long time about the ways of society. It's been in a decline since they took God out of the school system. Teen pregnancy went up, crimes went up, moral concious went down, etc, etc. When you take Him out of the plan, the plan will stink, plain and simple. So, yeah, the world doesn't want a conservative in office. That is plain to see. Interesting to note, that when we held anti-abortion signs up, we were targeted by screamers who were none the shamed to "uphold the values of the woman". Even in Republican state Oklahoma!!!

When we allow our children to dress and act like prostitues, when we drool over the latest nasty horror film, when we have more compassion for animals than humans, when we hand over birth control rather than teach abstinance (and I am NOT referring to the schools....it is the parents first!!) and all those other moral declines we are allowing, our world will fail. Nothing seems sacred anymore, and it is such an odd place to be one of the lone men out. I am firmly firmly firmly against abortion...but some conservatives would be okay with it. At least, they will call themselves conservatives, but they aren't if they think that way, are they? I am so firmly against it, that even in the event that I am faced with either an abortion or my life, I will chose my life. Because really??? What do doctors know for certain?? NOTHING!! I have read too many testimonies of women who did exactly the opposite of the doctors recommendations, and have faired just fine, thank you very much. So, more than likely, the health scare will pass, or will be fine enough to give birth and give that baby a chance. Even in the unlikely event that it will truly be an either-or, I will chose the or. True, I have a lot to live for, but I will give my life for my children.....all my children! Most don't feel this way.

When people are okay with homosexuals-that is another moral decline. God states He is firmly against this, and they choose to claim He isn't talking about it. Really?? It is not natural one bit! So the minute people became okay with this, they just set themselves up for more failure. I am not even talking about this subject from an outsider viewpoint either. My sister is gay!!! Except she wasn't for many, many years or before she had 3 children. She "turned" gay after being treated badly by men. So, it wasnt in her nature...

God will let what happens, happen. He is in control, but just like He doesn't stop the rapist from raping, He won't stop a dictator from dictating. That has to come from us, the human beings He created. We have to truly one day open our collective eyes and see what we have let this world fade into....stop the horror movies, and the love of self. Stop being okay and complacent with everything just because it's easier to do so. Stop letting Hollywood stereotypes set the standards for us. Just stop it all....and focus on God!

edited to add: right after I posted this, I read this quote on another blog. It sums my post up perfectly. “All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing”

also, here is this. "I believe that God will only allow a leader in power that He chooses. Sometimes God puts a leader in that will be our chastisement." as in...be careful what you wish for...you just might get it. And reap the "rewards" of that choice.

And hopefully that is all I have to say about this......it would be to tedious to bring up fraud, especially since I have already used the F for fathers. :)

Mother F

F is for family, and father's both. I think I craved a large family due to my own disfunctional family growing up. My real father had nothing to do with me, and my step-father...well, let's just say he had some good points, but ruined it when I turned 13. He was the one who taught me how to work for myself, and to try new things. He was very intelligent (a member of mensa and a non practicing lawyer) and he encouraged me to do anything I set my mind on. He became my step father when I turned 8, and he died about 10 years or so ago. However, what he did from 13 until 17 ruined any feelings I had for him, and I moved away and didn't shed a tear when he died.

My husbands father was a good guy, but he liked to drink. That caused a lot of issues in their family, and I can't comprehend what that was like. Sure, my dad got drunk and all, but he did it in the comfort of his own home. He wasn't a social drunk, and Tony's father was. My dad was pretty mild mannered when he drank, but I don't think that Tony's dad was....anyway.

My son's real father was a real winner...He denied that Austin was his for a very long time, and put a huge wall in between us. Then one day he decides to meet Austin and apologize for all those missed years. It was weird to say the least.

My daughter's father was unemployable, couldn't read and wasn't a pleasant person to be around mostly. He hid drugs in my roof, and liked to drink. He ended up in prison for things I can't talk about here, and proceeded to pass away while in prison. I was happy about that, because he did not deserve to ever get out, and that was an option that was coming up close to that time.

Why did I pick these guys? I don't know, but I can't say that I wish I hadn't, because if I do that, where would that have put me? My children are the greatest gift to me, and if I hadn't had them, I would be such a different person now. I was seriously headed the wrong direction and they stopped that. So, I am greatful bad people gave me great kids....

Lastly, Tony. He is a good father. He has his moments, and carries some baggage from his own father that I wish he could put behind him, and change. For the most part though??? He is great. My kids are blessed to have such a loving dad. He is very involved in the day to day stuff, and will not miss an opportunity to be with the kids.

Also, he wanted this large family too...Whether we are done now, or have 10 more, he is on board with me either way. I thank God for this father and my family.

Mother E

Everything! This describes my house perfectly. In one way, we have so much stuff that I think we have everything that was ever made. Too many clothes, books, games, videos, computers, etc. It has been such a work in progress to even make a dent in it, and I am still struggling with what to keep and what to get rid of. In another way, everything is how I view the kids stuff. Everyone gets to play with everything, I mean. We have a communal toy area, and I am trying to encourage sharing and cooperation. On the one hand, you would think that this won't work, because they need ownership and the ability to be able to say no, you can't touch. I thought this way for a long time, but all it did was make the kids selfish. They never wanted to share a thing!!! So, I took all ownership away, and while it does have it's problems too, it is much better for them to know that they must figure out a way to get along. Everything....good and bad.

Mother D

"what is your name, cute little boy?" they would ask. He would reply "Conner", but what did they hear much to his complete and utter frustration??? Donald. Every single time. He would say "NO, Not that, Conner!!!" and they would say "Donald?" Why did he do this? Because he had a speech impediment that all his other brothers shared. They all sounded exactly the same. It was kind of odd.... I was looking back through videos that we had taped from about 1 year ago, and they sounded so different than they do now. I am very glad we finally got off our rumpus's and did something about it. They all were in speech therapy for about 6 months, but I actually seem to remember that Conner "donald" graduated early, because he got it quicker than they did. So, ha on that Donald people!

Mother C

C is for crying, which is what my daughter did last night after Obama won. She is very fearful, and sad about what our country is turning into. It was hard comforting her, while at the same time, being upset myself. But isn't that what mom's and dad's do? Shove our feelings aside, while we fix our kiddos? I remember one time when a child and I got hurt together. I don't remember the specifics at the moment, but we were both hurt pretty bad. I wanted to cry and lose it completely, but the only thing that kept me in focus was that my child needed me more. Parenting is such a self sacrificing job, and people who choose to have no children are missing out on such an awesome shaping tool for their character. They are apt to be selfish, and lonely. I remember before I had kids, I didn't want kids anywhere near me. Don't touch my car, don't drool on me, and just go away already. ME, ME, ME! However, God tells us that children are a blessing for a reason. To mold us while we mold them. To come outside our comfort zones, and reach deep inside ourselves to find love and compassion for someone who is not us. It's a good place to be...

Mother B

Today's letter brings to mind basketball. We are starting the season today, so that is somewhat appropriate, don't you think? The tournament was a pre-season tournament, so it did not count. LOL! My son is so excited. He really enjoys basketball...not so much watching it on t.v., but playing it. Two years ago, he was on the same team, and his coach nearly ruined his passion. He wouldn't let him play, and there really weren't very good reasons either. Some of them were legit, like he didn't know the plays they were going to use, but others were simply that he was too tall, or looked too old. How ridiculous is that??? If a team can't play another team because a member is too tall, what business do they have playing? He was also very mean, and vocal. I didn't like him at all. He was in charge of the junior varsity, so this year, Austin, being on varsity was not going to be a problem. He played quite a bit in the first 2 tournament games, and was doing very well! Except they decided to join the j.v. teams and the varsity teams due to the lack of players on j.v. Do you see where this is going??? The coach couldn't be there for day 3, so the bad coach was in charge. YIPPEE..... He did not play Austin one single second. I was furious, hubby was furious, other people were furious. He didn't even allow conversation as to why, because he disappeared after they lost. So, I hope that is not an indication of how this year will be going, because if so, this momma will be in someones face. Don't kill my son's passion for no good reason.....He tries hard and is truly motivated to play. He is up on his schoolwork, faithfully practices, and is doing all the right things. Basketball....yippee! Wish us luck tonight.

Edited to add: they won, and Austin played the last 4 minutes of the game and did awesome. It was a hard fight, and they weren't able to play others for most of the game, but the starters pulled ahead, so the rest of the team could trickle in and get some court time. Congratulations, Trinity!

Mother A

A is for all of my children's names, either first or middle. Why? I don't know! It is just something I started with my first two, and promptly decided that if the next one wasn't an A name, he or she would feel left out. And on and on it went. Until child number 5, it remained a first name, but then got too hard to say when frustrated...Au-ash-adam....So then we went to middle names, and kinda followed the alphabet for the first names. Except when I thought God told me that Nathan was going to be Rachel, thus forcing me to deviate further from that nonsense...Backtracking a bit, when I got pregnant with Nathan, God told me your next child will be Rachel. I thought He meant the child I was carrying, so Rachel "she" was. They even told me twice that "she" was a she based on ultrasound. Imagine our surprise when Rachel came out with boy parts!!! So, God meant my next child...literally. We have Austin, Ashley, Adam, Aaron, then Braydon Alexander, Conner Avery, Nathan Andrew, and Rachel Anne. Next boy will be Joshua Allan. No clue what a girl would be....so God, if you're reading this, you can give me another name again. I won't mind. Tee Hee....


(just a little clue about the title...I am going to be attempting a series of alphabet centered mom stuff...soon it will be mother B, and it will be about something that starts with a B...got it???)

halloween

Halloween? Why does everyone participate in it? We used to do it until about 7 years ago. Haven't done it since. Too gory and scary for me....I hate how society twists everything. It seems backwards to me to celebrate such a ghoulish holiday surrounded in death and spirits if you're a christian. It just absolutely seems strange to me when people claim it is just a harmless "holiday" in which your kids get candy. If you just want candy, go buy some! Tell me your feelings about this...I am truly stumped. My best friend and my other close friend in town, both very conservative christians, trick or treat. JoAnn, you did it too. Tell me why...And I know how it got started, so I am not looking to find out the history, but simply knowing what it has turned into, why would you do it?

I love you all anyway, so please don't be offended by this, but it's got to be something we truly investigate and think out and not just do because everyone else is doing it.

ELECTION DAY A LITTLE EARLY

I VOTED!! ARE YOU GOING TO?

howdy all

I am alive...just busy. Huge 3 day basketball tournament in which my entire family was in charge of the concession stand (for 10 hours a day), then my back went out for 2 days, then trying to get back into the swing of being home now. Kids held down the fort for some of the time, but it is amazing how quickly things fall apart when you are gone or unavailable for 5 days.

Also, my best friend is moving tomorrow...I (and my family) am helping her pack the uhaul tomorrow. UGH!

Hope all is well with everyone.

oh, and I hate Halloween...I wish it did not exist!!! Just sayin'

Why I hate T.V.

I am tired of shedding tears over E.R. Seriously. Every week is giving me an emotional roller coaster that I JUST DON'T NEED! I have loved this show from the beginning and I thought it wouldn't be hard to say goodbye. Well, my friends.....It is. We just got through watching it, even though it was on 2 nights ago...So, yeah. I am behind. But argh!!! Bye Abby!!

Anyone feel me on this?

I can't believe I did this......

I threw my wedding dress away!!! I kind of did it to manipulate someone, and it backfired. I had my daughter try it on, and it fit her (can't believe I used to be somewhat small)....so I asked if she wanted it. She kind of looked like "eh" and said "no, not really". I said, "fine, I will throw it out then"... "I don't need it". Thinking that she would say "no, mama...give it to me. I will wear it after all", BUT she didn't. And i forgot that I actually DID toss it in the trash can, until the day AFTER trash day. It wasn't a traditional wedding dress. It would have made a nice church dress, or she COULD have worn it at her own wedding, either way. BUT I THREW IT AWAY! WAH!!!!!!!!!!

sheesh, it's been a week already?

So, hi! How was your week? Mine was busy! The story of my life. Between robotics, robotics, and football, I haven't seen much of my husband and my oldest son. They worked the dominoes booth for our college team last week, and made 100.00 bucks, but it was allllll day long. Today they are an hour away at a mall, showing their robotic stuff to other robotic makers. This is a good skill for my oldest. He has learned how to operate a lathe, a drill press, a sautering gun, and many other things I can't think of. He is also learning about how to burn trash. That isn't a robotic thing....just a farmer/kid thing. I hope he is paying attention, because we may have to burn our own trash if we move to the country.

Still waiting on Rachel's wheelchair/stroller, and her bath seat, and her stander. Goodness! These government insurance companies/makers of equipment places are sure slow. We put the order in 2 months ago. She will surely love the stander though. She is always wanting to be upright, and this will help with feet positioning and bone development.

School is okay! I found out last week that one of my friends may pull her son out of school and homeschool him. She is tired of him being bullied daily. That is one thing I won't have to worry about anymore. What is wrong with kids nowadays? Oh, who am I kidding? I was bullied 20 years ago. (DID I JUST SAY 20 YEARS AGO????) OH, my gosh, I am old! wow. that was an epihany.

Okay, I have recovered. Best friend moving an hour away. That is par for the course. Everyone moves.....I am sad kinda. I mean, we really don't get together much, because we have struggled with things in the past between our oldest daughters, and then just life. But we do go out occasionally to eat a bagle and chat. And we talk on the phone. (yes, I know you aren't supposed to start sentences with and or but...but this is my blog :P ) We made our friendship work again, and are on an even ground now, but lo and behold, she is moving. So, it will be harder I assume.

Still struggling with wanting/not wanting to be pregnant. This is hard, yall!!! I know how miserable I am while pregnant, and just bending over feels great. I don't want to lose that! Plus, the whole Rachel thing. I am supposed to be getting more genetic tests done soon. Not that I really think anything will show up, plus I have 7 other normal (are they really normal???) kids, and what are the chances twice?

Anyway, hands cramping...house calling for lunch. Talk again soon........

remember this old room?

books, books, books!


More books! Overflowing bookshelves

Now, has been transformed into a bedroom fit for 2 queens. We have all the chapter/series books in here now. One door shelf unit is empty and the other one has magazines. The whole top row is empty.
Queen B is above, and Queen A is below. Now, we can have the dining room back for our exercise room and have all the kids down the hall. Oh, and the kids and I did this all by ourselves. Tony and Austin were gone all day. Go us!

someone is sitting unassisted!

beds and potty training....

I really need a new bed!! What kind of bed is good for 2 overweight people who move around alot? I am waking up completely miserable and sore...Laying on one side makes that side burn, so I am left with my back and my left side. I don't want to pour lots of money into a bed and have it be just as bad...so, help!?!

On another note. This potty training business is driving me berserk. I tried it before with Nathan and he would kind of do it, but mostly not. So, we decided to stop for awhile, and let him grow up a bit. Now, he is content to do his business in the potty or in his pants. Doesn't matter to him. I tried the jelly bean tricks, and he will pee a tiny bit in the potty and scream for his jelly bean. I will make him get it all out, and he will...but only to pee AGAIN 5 minutes later. Why does he have so much pee? He might poop in the potty, but then again he might not. If I have a protective pull up on him, he will pee in it. If I have underwear on him, he will poop in it. I am about to pull my hair out with this one. It has NEVER been this hard with any of the other kids. He is going to be 3 the end of this month.

Good morning all! A role model post

Well, today is starting off with a bang. I totally forgot that my oldest daughter was supposed to go with a friend as a helper with her children, and so when the doorbell rang, and the door was opened by her, I had a mild panic attack. First off, I wasn't dressed. I was still in bed snuggling with a kiddo or three. Second of all, my house is a mess (surprise, surprise!) So, I throw a towel around me, let her in (there was no use letting her hang out on the porch as it was chilly, and she already saw the house anyway) and go wake up the daughter. ACK!! I hope she wasn't offended that I stood there in a towel to talk to her. Would that offend you? I really have no idea what I was thinking, other than it could have been my husband knocking, because one child said it was daddy...but I should have known better.

I am off to the next thing. I must shake these things off, because it does NO use to dwell on them. Really....why dwell on what you cannot change, right?

Homeschooling is still going well. I need to supplement with other things, just because I don't like the constant computer time. They are whizzing through their work however. Each day is logged on these programs, and they do much more than a days worth of work. For example, one child is already into the next year and he just started a little more than a month ago. Is it too easy?? Seems hard to me. Maybe this child is smart? That would be cool!

Speaking of smart. I was reflecting the other day about how I was in school. I never had friends, well...maybe a couple. My circumstances assured that I would never be popular though. My parents were poor, old, and unhip. They smoked, so I in turn smelled like I smoked. (I didn't actually start smoking myself until later) People made fun of me endlessly. Somehow, I was able to not let this bother my grades, and was generally on top of the class levels. When I got to high school, they had this program for the AP kids where you could leave campus for lunch. I would go smoke cigarettes at the local fast food place. Wasn't that what you would expect from an honors student?

I really hated my childhood and lack of parental involvement. Seriously. When my mom found out I smoked, she got mad, but didn't make me quit. She just told me I would have to buy them. My dad bought them before that. Anyway, lack of people interested in my welfare, and morals led me to become immoral and so I fell off the honors program and got pregnant. My junior/senior year in high school, I was only going to school half a day, working the other half, and lamenting my growing ankles and hurting back. I had my child, went back to school and graduated somewhat top of my class (I had fell far away from where I was) and promptly settled into my role as mom. I don't regret what I did, but I do regret what everyone around me did.

God was faithful, even when I didn't know Him. He carried me through LOTS of problems I experienced as a single mom. I made so many mistakes back then, but time heals all wounds, right? I was just thinking about all this because of how we parent. I can't imagine being the parents mine were. Not caring where I was, who I was with, what I watched, what I ate....Maybe they were just too old, and wanted it (parenting) to be over. I can't imagine!

A little query for you

Is this bad for her? She likes to chew on the bars, and as much as I try to move her and her attention elsewhere, this is where she lands again sometimes. I took the bumper out because she wants to see around her...so hmm? Any ideas on other cribs?

someone is learning to crochet

Looky...now my body AND my fingers hurt. Why does exercise hurt so much? Does this look good?

Youtube linky..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yo_24_qTNac&feature=related

If you feel a little down about your situation, listen to this guy! He is awesome....

we got a wii!!!!!!!!!!

We got this thing about 2 weeks ago, and boy howdy!!! It kicks my butt when I play it. I know...I know. Waste of time and all, but not really. We all play as a family, and plus it is exercise for miss fat momma here. I am literally sweating by the time my turn is up. We got the wii fit, but haven't opened it yet for different reasons. My husband thinks it will be awesome, but I am not sure yet. It weighs you and all that stuff, so maybe I just don't want something on the tv telling my weight? Ha! I never thought we would be owners of such expensive stuff, but without cable (been almost 10 months woohoo!) we need an outlet. And did I mention it's exercise for miss fat momma??? Puff puff!

He wishes.........

Rachel and her beads....

or bling bling like her therapist calls them. She loooves her beads. I mean, loves. They motivate her to crawl, reach, sit...you name it. I don't know what it is that appeals to her, but ever since we found this out, we look like we are stocking up for mardi gras. So, if you ever hit a clearance sale of beads, hook us up. She has broken several of them, and while you would think they are dangerous to let a little baby play with, she only does so under supervision. Also, it is a long string of attached beads, so they don't break into little balls. So, whatever motivates her, huh?

You know what makes me sad right now???

If I had learned about Rachel's disability before she was born, they would have asked me if I wanted to abort her. There are people out there who have aborted babies just like her because they are told that their quality of life would greatly harm them. I know for a fact that my world and my children's worlds are much better off having her. Why can't others see that?

They asked me if I wanted to abort Aaron when I was about 20 weeks pregnant with him. Why? He had classic markers for Downs syndrome. We said most emphatically NO!!! Lo and behold, he was born completely fine, and I shudder to think what could have happened if I wasn't so against the idea of abortion.

Everyone deserves to live, even if they aren't wanted by their parents. Someone would take care of that child. And if they didn't practice premarital sex so wantonly and without thought, they wouldn't have to worry about it. I had to accept responsibility for my actions, and it most certainly didn't kill me to do so. Also, if God wants to give them a child with a disability, then it's their responsibility to care for that child either themselves, or adopt the child out and allow it to live it's life until God calls him/her back home. PERIOD!

Does she look like she hates being alive? I didn't think so!

i hate titles....who can think of good titles????

Yeah, so...titus2 conference. It would be an extreme lifestyle change, and would be super hard, but we can't even begin implementing anything unless we (husband and I) are on the same page. He is all over sports, and doesn't see anything wrong with it. He feels that because they don't control him, that they wouldn't possibly control the kids in the future. I feel like they could, and while it is a learning experience being in a team, it is setting them up for possible failure later on. He also likes tv, and movies, and is always mentioning getting tv back, which is am adamantly opposed to. Soooo, without going into much more, we obviously do not agree here, and that is sad.

They were great speakers, and their kids were very nice and well mannered. It was neat seeing a "celebrity" in my world. But it just made things more painfully aware to me.

On to other news. Rachel is eating many more soft solid foods now. I need to weigh her, because we haven't done that in awhile. Also, she must look somewhat disabled now, which saddens me. An ped. opthomologist came up to us at the conference and was talking about her, and one of our "friends" said "she does have a wee little head, doesn't she?". What is up with that remark??? I am probably too thin skinned, and he was probably just affirming to himself what he already knew, but it is getting more and more obvious. It will become more so when her stroller/wheelchair comes in. Its one that is plainly for handicapped kids, but I am excited about it because it is easier to push than a regular stroller, plus it holds her up so she can look around.

Homeschooling is going okay. We are doing switched on schoolhouse this year for some of the kids, and while I like it, I don't like the computer time...is it setting them up for being addicted to a computer? They are only on it for about an hour a day, but still?? We were thinking about VoTech for our oldest, but now....the Maxwell's brought up a scenerio involving a christian family who sent their child to a secular votech, and promptly lost him to the world. So!!! Hmm?? See, radical thinking, but it really makes sense.

House falling apart slowly again. I just did a massive cleaning of the outside. People would stop and think we were having a yard sale, because of the sheer amount of toys etc in our yard. So, we gave away, or threw away a bunch, and now our yard is nice and pretty. I am focusing on the house again now. It's so pretty outside though, and it made cleaning outside easy. but alas, the inside must be done too? darn it.

oh, come on....surely you know them??!!??

Does titus2.com ring a bell with you at all robyn?

Guess who we got to see today????

You can now return to your regularly scheduled programming...or laundry (robyn) or house (joann)

Okay.....so. 9/11/08 wont be a hard date to remember for next month. I need to buy stock in pregnancy tests. Goodness, we went through a bunch this time. I am a pregnancy test addict. There should be some support group or something. :)

Things that make you go hmmm.

Last period August 5th, and new one nowhere in sight. Multiple tests are negative. Hmmmm???

a meme of sorts. feel free to post your own version of this on your blogs. i will read them!

Favorite food? Chicken fettucini, with lots of parmesan cheese. Yummo!!! Or anything with BACON.....

Quirks about you? I make up song lyrics all the time to coincide with whatever I want it to. The music and tempo will be the same, but the lyrics will be personalized. And I am good at it too. I rhyme and everything, mostly.

Any regrets in life? That I trusted someone too much.

Favorite Blog recently? I blog hop all the time. I regularly read a select few, and then I hop around, adding others to my favorites, but don't go back as often, because I have forgotten about them. I like blogs about large families though...duh. Except the ones I find all public school and are very worldly. Which I am not...so....hmm.

Something you can’t get enough of? Dr.Pepper. I can't kick that darn habit to save my life. I am cutting down on them though. I am at 2 a day instead of 3.

Worst job you've ever had? working in a nursing home. My back went out, and I was glad I had to quit...

What job would you pay NOT to have? Dishes...yeah, robyn. I know.... Tonight my 17 year old did them, so ha!! I am trying. Or if we are talking profession here, I would never ever be a plumber. EW! Self explanatory.

If you could be a fly on the wall, where? watching my children when they have no idea. I am always curious as to their choices when I am not hovering over them. I hope I am raising them right, but you never truly know unless you are that fly on the wall...

Favorite Bible verse right now? Well, I keep thinking about the one that says :"if you believe, you will recieve, whatever you ask for in prayer" Now, I wonder why I am not receiving, when I am believing, but that is my own little issue.

Guilty Pleasure? Chocolate chip mint ice cream...

If you HAD to spend $1,000 on YOURSELF, how would you spend it? I have no idea, because it goes against everything I stand for to spend money on myself. I hate shopping for clothes, dont get my hair done, never had a manicure or pedicure, and just dont buy things for myself usually. Unless its thrift store stuff. Then, I may buy it, but even then, it has to be pretty special. Now, I will buy for the kids and my husband...

Favorite thing about your house? I like the size, and the fact that all the closets have shelves and dressers built in.

Least favorite thing about your house? the plumbing, the plumbing, the plumbing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One thing you are bad at? decorating my house all pretty.

One thing you're good at? being a mommy....I love to get down and play or hang out with my olders...I like to talk to them. etc.

If you could change something about your circumstances, what? I would be out of this house, in one in the country, and have my husband home more. I would also change my son's need for friends. He is very codependant on them, and it has caused a lot of issues in our house lately.

Who would you like to meet someday? Michelle Duggar

Who is your real life hero? I have no idea.....

What is the hardest part of your job? Getting it all done. If I focus on housework, schooling suffers. If I focus on school work, the cooking doesn't get done. If I focus on cooking, the laundry falls apart. I know Robyn.....don't say a word. I am workin' on it. LOL.

When are you most relaxed? after bedtime for the youngest kiddos.

What stresses you out? cooking, and crying kids. I really don't do well in the mercy department, so when they are just carrying on and on for no apparent reason, except to tell you that they got hurt....good lord child!!. Get over it and stop screaming already. And I hate to cook....just hate it. Seriously. I wish I could have a chef.

What can you not live without? My husband or my children. And dr. pepper. And bacon

Why do you blog? to record memories and thoughts from a time that is just zooming by at breakneck speed. Does time slow down when you are older, or is it all downhill from here? I don't know but I forget the past very quickly and easily it seems, and it makes me cry that I can't remember the little things, so I want to get it down.

mishmash of stuff

My baby went from happy go lucky to grumpy....this has put some kinks in my days. I sure hope it's not a permanent deal, or I may go slowly insane. It's somewhat disconcerting when an infant is grumpy all the time, but when you have a disabled child who is changing like that and you can't make her happy, wow! I know she isn't in pain or anything like that, but she may be getting tired of her limitedness. Do you think this makes sense? Hopefully, its a phase. please!!

Ashley started vocal music class yesterday, and Adam/Austin will be starting robotics class soon. Plus basketball for Austin. This should do it for this year. Oh, except for 4-H which is the whole family and only 1 time a month. Tony gets to go to robotics too, so pretty much all family centered stuff.

Still no church, and it's still just as hard. Now they are finally calling, and I wish I didn't care. Can you truly grow up well adjusted if you don't have friends? Really????

Got my laundry caught up, and my dishes too! I am actually doing them every single day and keeping up on them. WOO HOO! This is very difficult for me, so the fact that I am achieving that goal is an awesome feat. Once I get my rhythm, then I can get a kid on it, and have a good example to show.

Go me...

LOL!

oh, if only I could just throw it all out.................

Hey, guess what??? Housework STILL stinks. I swear this is the excercise plan of the year though. Not that I am losing weight, but I am not as sore or as tired as I was 3 days ago. What ever will I do once it's all done? Maintenance will not be this hard....

Sort, purge, kick. Robyn.....remember that?

housework stinks.......

I am so t.i.r.e.d. I have been doing a laundry and dishes marathon.... Once again, I let it get very behind, and boy, do I feel it. You know what is weird?? I washed things that the kids wore last winter!!??!! Can you believe that? I think I was depressed or something. Seriously, everything fell behind. Blogs, emails, laundry, dishes, housework, schoolwork, you name it. We did bare minimum all the time. It's good to finally be getting out of that funk. Oh....but my back and hands are cramping. I am most definatly NOT Robyn. (who by the way, has forgotten about me :( haha)

The fair day 2.

We took the littler (is that a word?) guys today, and bought a 30 pack for 60.00! Gosh, that is alot of money. We split them amongst the 4 boys and even let the older ones ride a couple with a younger sibling. They had fun. It's a really expensive tradition. We need to make a different one, because the more kids we have, and the more the prices go up for this thing, the more my checkbook cries. Anyway...they DID have fun, so that is what matters, right?



Our 8 year old is stuck between being too big for the baby rides and too little for the big kid rides. He was a trooper though. He rode the scariest ride there, and promptly got sick to his stomach, except he didn't throw up thank goodness. Just naseua (how do you spell that word?) and turned white as a sheet. Dad had to take him inside in the airconditioning to help him recover. However, the rest of the evening was uneventful, and we got home about 9 pm. 3 hours at fair, and happy meals at McDonalds was the highlight of their week.

The fair....night 1

Well, Adam won 1st place in the 4-H art class, and participation only in the huge open class. Ashley won 3rd in her 4-H art division and Braydon got participation in open class. Open class was HUGE!!!!!!!!!!! 4-H was pretty big, but obviously open only to 4-H members.

Spent 60.00 bucks on arm bands for the carnival and walked around taking pictures. My feet ache!!!!!!!!!!! Spent 3 and a half hours there, and they came home feeling sick, but happy. I don't understand the allure, but I used to love carnivals too. I rode one really bad ride when I was pregnant with my oldest, and that's his favorite today. Weird huh? Probably not the smartest thing I ever did...but it turned out okay. I don't think I was very far along. Anyway...

we are going to the fair

tonight me and the bigger kids are going to the fair/carnival. we have done this every year I can remember. Usually we take everyone, but this year, we are shakin' it up a bit. the older ones can buy a bracelet and do things on their own, without having to wait for the littles. also, they entered art into the fair and are anxious to know if they placed anything. they get money if they did....cool huh? will update later.

Happy Birthday Austin

You are 17 years old today, and boy I have no idea where the time went. I don't feel old enough to have a 17 year old. Somedays, I feel like I am 17 myself. This parenting gig is weird.

You are very awesome! Still tender and gentle. You drive responsibly, you like to go shopping for me, you loan me money without thinking about it ( I do pay you back, but if I didn't, you wouldn't care), you love being around your family, and you're quite the comedian.

We have no idea where to go with your life plan, but we will get there, I am sure.

Yesterday, we went to the christian book store, and you spent 30.00 on bumper stickers and christian jewelry. This is so you.....you always share your faith. Shirts/all christian themed, jewelry/all christian themed, etc etc. We told you to make sure you drive good because with all those bumper stickers, you would make a bad witness if you drove crazy. You laughed....because you understand what we mean.

I LOVE YOU, KIDDO. You may be 6'3" but you're still and always will be my baby.

WAHOOOOO!!!!

Ladies, and um...ladies. We interrupt this pitiful blog to let you both know that my baby has sat up for the first time with no arms on the ground holding her. She is 21 months old and can I just say-YES!!!!!!!!!! Of course when I tried to take her little picture doing so, she had already flopped over and was smiling at me. But, if she can do it for 3 seconds, she can do it longer. Practice makes perfect, Rach.

where in the world is holly sandiego? Har!

Wow...another week almost gone again. Is it just me, or does time whiz by for everyone after 30 years old or something?

Where are we? Well, still feeling the church seperation thing. Its a little more difficult because 1.)we have been there 8 years. 2.)all the homeschool stuff is held there 3.)the pastor is persistant. 4.)the kids miss it. I hate this! Really I do. Everything I read about youth groups and such makes me glad they are away from it, but how are we supposed to go to church then? My husband does not want to home church, which stinks....but no one is like us anymore. So there is this frustration...

School has begun, much to my displeasure. I really don't like the beginnings of the school year, because of character flaws in my children that I know is my fault, but its still upsetting non the less. One child in particular is a perfectionist who hates to do anything he feels wont be perfect. Do you know how frustrating that is??? Just do your best and try, son. I wont shoot you for not being perfect...really!!! Another wants to go to a technical training school, and thus......be around other public school kids!!!!! Weeeeee....my idea of fun. NOT! Except, how do you learn a trade without training??? UGH.

House was almost done, except school and hubby work issues. Now I am backslidding and darn it, I wont let it happen!!!!! I used to juggle many different plates and not let any fall, and now, one plate is causing me problems. True, now having a disabled child has put many kinks into my daily life, so I know where the root is, but I really need to figure out how to handle it better. Does it get any better?? Or does it just get harder? In theory, I would have to assume harder because the older she gets, the more difficult, but darn, what am I gonna do then? Sheesh.

Today is not such a good day, and that is why I am typing all this out. Tomorrow will probably be peachy, and I will be in more control of things...but today-not so much.

My husband has worked crazy hours since he got back from camp, and I really need him to help me...I am sooo co-dependant, aren't I? :)

Oh, and my only friend here in town is moving away. Doesn't that just make the icing on the cake?

in case you cared.....

no 911 call needed. its 6:00 pm and we are done! whew!

cleaning out the garage again........

Didn't I just do this????? In any event, if I don't post again later this evening, call 911. I will probably be buried somewhere underneath a pile of crap. 2nd yard sale here we come. My house is thanking my garage. Its so decluttered and pretty. Soon, I will be done.....................soon!!!!!!!

rambling..................

This is completely ridiculous! I think I have never even come close to feeling this overwhelmed and wanting to pull the covers over my head before. I am absolutely having to pull myself along every day. I have no idea what it is, but it is the worst feeling ever. I am usually on top of things and chipper, but now, it's like...."breakfast, again??? Already?" etc. It feels like a huge fog, and its crazy. Every day whizzes by at breakneck speed, which is good because feeling like this for a long drawn out day everyday would suck....LOL. But its like one day I woke up fallen very very very behind, and I can't catch up at all, and the train is leaving the station at 100 mph. Does this sound like anything you have ever heard?

I just want to do nothing at all until I get everything settled down, but darn if I can, because hubby works, oldest has basketball games, and next oldest son wants me to help him work to get money. and hubby and oldest have softball games that they like me to attend. ACK!!!!!!

We are about to embark on a new journey called no church. Or at least finding another church.....which feels alot like getting a divorce. We have gone here for 8 years, and its just not good for us anymore, but darn if I think there IS anything good for us anymore. My husband does NOT want to home church, but there are no very family centered, no youth group having, and homeschoolers only churches around. So, what to do? Having the kids around all the public schooled nonsense children in our church (while they are better than most children I have seen) has done nothing positive for my children. It has been the opposite as a matter of fact, but its hard now for them to possibly be happy about saying good bye. What about their friends?????? I hear this all the time. And where are all those darn conservative christian children anyway? I want my kids to be around people like us, and only have friends who hold the same values, and not want to be just like the typical teenagers etc....but there are none!!!!!!!!!!!! And my children seem to think that they need friends.

I am so very tired of feeling like I want to get off this train...........

how 'bout a pinata pic?

This little boy was born the exact day that Rachel was born. My what a difference in size and ability, huh?

sorry robyn and joann

Between mission trip in june, camp in july, and huge 8 person birthday bash in august, I am beat!!!!!!! I have no time to do anything and I am constantly overwhelmed, and behind on everything.

I truly feel like a fish without water, so, I am neglecting this blog. Please forgive me, and pray for me if you feel like it. I really need to get back to normal, and soon. But, at least this gives you a better picture to see while you keep checking to see if my brain is back or not.

ahhhhh, what am i gonna do???

My hubby and my 2 oldest kids are leaving for a week of summer camp on monday! Those are my helpers!! However, we have subs for the paper routes, so we are just gonna take it easy and do some more decluttering, and watching speed racer. Wish us luck!!!!!

true

"The Bible calls debt a curse and children a blessing; but in our culture, we apply for a curse and reject blessings. Something is wrong with this picture." ~ Doug Phillips

hapy 4th of july....3 days later

we took up alot of room.....